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Joke of the Day

"What do American beer and sex in a canoe have in common? F***ing close to water!"

"[OC] My therapist asked me what was my earliest erotic remembrance and I told him it was wearing my mother's lingerie when I was a child. he said it was probably a Freudian slip."

"What's the difference between a nicely dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a tricycle? [x-post from r/bicycling] Attire"

"Never trust a homeless person selling warm lemonade"

"What did Pippin Took do when he was drunk? He began to feel Merry."

"[pitching movie] ""It's Titanic..."" Go on ""from the iceberg's perspective"" holy shit"

"What do you call a lazy immigrant ? A United States citizen"

"The joke about the sun Is too hot to handle"

"I have Note 7...I have a charger....ugh... Bomb has been planted."

"Had sex with my nephew's English teacher. Texted her the next day ""Last nite was grate. Your so awsome!"" so I don't have to see her again."