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Joke of the Day
"How do crazy people make it through a forest? They take the psycho-path."
Next Joke
"*Attempts to use 'I have a boyfriend' meme* Meme: I have a boyfriend."
"I like my coffee like my politics... I don't like coffee."
"Carpet Fitting by Walter Wall"
"Last night I lay in bed ...looking up at the beautiful stars shining in the night sky. And I thought to myself... Where the heck is the ceiling?!?"
"The farther away the future is, the better it looks."
"Emailing professors be like Me: *polite greeting, multiple paragraphs, perfect grammar* Professor: ""sure"" -sent from my iPhone"
"Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn't doing his part of the chores around here"
"Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors? Because if it had 4 doors, it would be a chicken sedan!"
"Two ducks are arguing in a bar about quantum physics... One turns to the other and says, 'Quark Quark' The other says, I'll have a Harvey Schrodinger, thanks'."