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Joke of the Day

"A Neutron walks into a bar ""I'd like a beer,"" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. ""How much will that be?"" asks the neutron. ""For you?"" replies the bartender, ""no charge."""

"*Eats a snack while making a snack*"

"The Bank of America app randomly disappeared off my phone and now I'm wondering how much money I spent last night."

"Jim: Tim, see if the indicator lights are working... Tim: Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no..."

"adulthood is just eating a taco where the toppings keep falling out and then death"

"How does a Japanese chihuahua say hello? Konichihuahua"

"Rumours suggest Usain Bolt has been cheating on his wife. I'm amazed she hasn't caught him. Then I remembered that he can finish in 9.58 seconds."

"(business meeting) *drops pen on the floor* *bends over to pick it up* *shirt comes untucked* *all the jelly beans start falling out*"

"What's the difference between a white Jew and a black Jew? The black Jew has to sit in the back of the gas chamber."

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? America can't milk a cow for 15 years."