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Joke of the Day

"Jesus walks into a hotel He hands the inn keeper 3 nails and asks, ""Could you put me up for the night?"" Credit to the movie ""The Crow"" Edit: I'm going to hell."

"Subway is like prostitution... You pay someone else to do your wife's job!"

"Why did the Bee get married? Because she found her honey!"

"My suicide notes just keep turning into grocery lists."

"Patient: Doctor what should I do if my temperature goes up five more points? Doctor: Sell!"

"Three guys walk into a bar. They pretend to hear each other for two hours and then go home"

"What do you call a litter of puppies who've been out in the snow? Slush Puppies"

"if squids were land animals sometimes you'd be walking along and you'd look up and BAM squid in a tree"

"i asked a German man if he had a wife He said he had nein."

"Met the daughter's new boy friend. Grabbed his crotch and whispered 'looking forward to tonight's three way'... And that is that."