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Joke of the Day

"The Inuits don't deal with your crap, because they're having Nunavut."

"I think the implication that you might want to share your Kit Kat with 3 friends seems unreasonable."

"What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One's a scum-sucking bottom-feeder, and the other's a fish."

"There's a black guy in my family tree... he's still hanging there."

"Did you hear about the idiot who made his chickens drink boiling water? He thought they would lay hard boiled eggs."

"The punchline comes first. How can you be sure that a comedian has traveled back in time?"

"[phone rings] Mum: your grandad isn't well. I'm afraid he's on his deathbed Me: well tell him to get in a different bed then"

"friend: let's meet up soon me: *in the crow's nest of a ship docking outside your house* when though"

"What confuses a gay person? Seven"

"What is brown and sticky? A brown stick."