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Joke of the Day

"""Keep busy, you should."" Yoda said. ""Make your Dagobah faster, it will."""

"I asked God for a bike... but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"Sometimes I call meteors hot space potatoes and everyone just keeps ignoring me"

"I heard the titanic got a new job... She sells sea shells down by the sea floor. I hear it's a pretty high pressure job."

"How do fish lose weight? They Swim-fast."

"What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper? Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads ""Lindsay Lohan in jail"""

"People who carry their dogs around, You know they can walk, right? Theyre real good at it. It's like one of the top known things about dogs"

"That heroic moment where one of your chips break off in the dip and you send another one into save it."

"David Hume's 'Dialogues Concerning Natural Religion' was published after his death, or in other words... it was published posthumeously."

"I used to be addicted to the Hokey-Cokey But I turned myself around, and that's what it's all about."