207876

Joke of the Day

"The biggest lie in advertising is someone taking a bite of a hard shell taco & it not immediately exploding in their hands."

"From my 91 year old grandpa Q: What is the difference between a vitamin and a hormone? A: You can't hear a vita-min."

"Some people say I hang out with the wrong crowd. They're always like ""Hey man we're over here you don't even know those people."""

"Have you heard a dad joke about dad jokes? I've never meeted an person who had."

"Ever since I became asexual I've found I have to repeat myself a lot. ... You're not getting it? Neither am I. ... Let me reiterate."

"Can't you see I'm on an important phone call with a host from QVC?"

"I hate it when kids say that they hate vegetables. Like what the hell did Steven Hawking do to you?"

"An Irish guy walks out of a bar... And that is the joke"

"Homework is like a penis.... its long and hard unless you're asian."

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes a long time, and the lightbulb has to want to change..."