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Joke of the Day

"[Security breach at Wayne manor] BRUCE: *brooding darkly* ALFRED: The back door is literally just a waterfall"

"What's the hardest thing on a cowboy? The 4th grade."

"""Dude, we should swap spacesuits. Just for a laugh."" ""Ha, yeah ok."" [swaps suits] ""Now we sh-"" ""You took a shit in this, didn't you?"""

"How do you say hello to a femnist? You don't. To do so would violate her wish to not be part of the society she lives in."

"NOT EVERYONE WAS KUNG FU FIGHTING, MOM. SOME OF US WERE TRYING TO BREAK IT UP."

"You know what they say about living on Navy ships? It has its ups and downs."

"There's a secret evolution of Eevee I found today. If you pay your Eevee every day for at least a month, it evolves into Patreon."

"Double standards are the worst. I mean, one flag is enough."

"""What doesn't kill you makes you smaller."" ~Mario"

"Yo mama so fat when she moves, the space-time ripples are detectable with naked eye."