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Joke of the Day

"I bought a new lock for my bedroom door Wound up getting half off when it didn't work."

"I'm sick of reading them, these vagina jokes have got to stop Period."

"CW: Why don't you ever wear your hair down? Me: It makes me look approachable. CW: So? Me: I don't want to encourage that."

"There are 30 cows. 28 chickens. How many didn't? 10"

"I installed IOS 9 Beta. And it shot up my school."

"Not to brag, but I have the high score on 7 different blood pressure machines around the city. *enters initials"

"How many black people does it to pave a driveway? One. You just have to spread him real thin."

"When it comes to penis size I'm happy to report that I'm actually a little above average. Thank god for Asians."

"How come Barbie never got pregnant? Because Ken always came in another box."

"The difference between a smart man and a wise man is that a smart man knows what to say, a wise man knows whether or not to say it..."