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Joke of the Day

"Then outermost layer of your skin is mostly dead cells, so congratulations you're dead on the outside as well as the inside."

"When people say 'oh, you're still single?' I like to reply with 'wow, you're still married?' I'm popular."

"Currently the flower business is blooming."

"Why you shouldnt vote for Hillary because Bill always chose someone other than Hillary, and you should too"

"Us New Yorkers try to stick to the four main food groups; pizza, pizza bagels, pizza pies, and cheesecake."

"Niggas be like I want a girl that rocks Jordan's, plays video games, and watches sports with me"" wtf? You want a boyfriend nigga"

"What did the vegan say when he saw someone familiar? I've seen herbivore."

"If I have three bags of sour skittles and a child steals one bag of my sour skittles. What will I have at the end of the day? Three bags of skittles and a small body to hide."

"You don't really know someone until you get ridiculously drunk with them."

"How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Well apparently not eight cause my basement is still dark."