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Joke of the Day

"HER: I love Deadpool ME: I love Dead Pool HER: Oh, cool, you read comics too? ME: *staring out at pond where I toss victims' bodies* Hmm?"

"2010: Didn't jog 2011: Didn't jog 2012: Didn't jog 2013: Didn't jog 2014: Haven't jogged ~ This is a running joke"

"What does Uncle Vernon from Harry Potter not do on Reddit? Post on Sundays."

"I wonder if Jeremy Irons ever quietly laughs to himself while he's ironing."

"I met my statistics teacher at the store today... What are the odds!"

"What do you call a cow with no hind legs? an utter drag"

"Why are batman and black man different? Bat man can go a whole night without robin"

"Why do Farts Smell so Bad? So the deaf can enjoy them too."

"I don't trust a taxi cab that has more than two air fresheners."

"I'm not calling you a slut, But if you had a password for your vagina it would be ""1234"""