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Joke of the Day
"""how about an animal that looks like a cross between a horse and a barcode"" - creator of zebras"
Next Joke
"other 21 year olds: going on dates, bein cool, having fun me: trying to become friends w/ the birds outside my house by offering them bread"
"Why wouldn't you teach a woman how to ski? Because there's no snow between the kitchen and the bedroom.."
"Never date a baker They're too kneady"
"If you wake up tomorrow with Santa jacking off at your bedside, do not be alarmed. He is giving you a white Christmas"
"Her: Let's go see 50 Shades of Grey Me: Tonight? Her: Yes [After the movie] Her: OMG that was so hot! Me: Mom, please just stop talking"
"I was gonna cut my hair, but I kind of like it, It's growing on me."
"Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? They steal all the green cards."
"Whatever happened to the Bob the Builder kids show? Handy Manny took his job."
"My wife told me to stop my obsession of singing 'Wonderwall' I said maybe...."