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Joke of the Day

"What do reddit and Playboy magazine have in common? No one actually reads the articles."

"Whats the best part about a dead hooker The second hour is free"

"My son: Mommy I can't wait to grow up and be a man. Me: Don't be silly son, you can't do both"

"*leaning seductively, slowly dragging fingertip across countertop* Me: how much for the entire case? Donut shop clerk: ma'am, $8.99 a dozen"

"Why did the woman turn to her husband and say ""now who the hell would dump such a nice sofa out here in the woods?"" She was looking at a bear and thought it was a sofa due to the four legs."

"School Doctor: Have you ever had trouble with appendicitis? Fred: Only when I tried to spell it."

"Today, A 12 year-old came up to me and said ""May I please have a cigarette?"". I can't believe kids this age are already so polite."

"I miss you like an idiot misses the point."

"""And you don't want hairy hands, now do you? Oh! And googling 'it' will make you go blind..okay! Mommy loves you."" - Sis at her 9 year old."

"How are a hobo and a balloon alike? Both are without visible means of support. (My son found that in a children's joke book)"