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Joke of the Day

"The term 'Grammar Nazi' is outdated and offensive... ...we prefer to be called the Alt-Write"

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay to see a lentil."

"Did you hear about the guy who escaped from a lunatic asylum, raped a bunch of old women in a laundrette then ran away? The newspaper headlines the next day read: #**NUT SCREWS WASHERS AND BOLTS**#"

"What does a fresh egg say when you try to hardboil it? It'll take me about 20 minutes to get hard, I just got laid by some chick."

"Good news for insomniacs Only 3 more sleeps till Christmas!!"

"whoever thinks money doesn't bring happiness, transfer it to my account."

"I used to have a fat joke with good taste but your mom ate it."

"Did you hear about the cookie that was litterally made of nothing but grass and dirt? it was a real tuft cookie"

"Q: What wobbles as it flies? A: A jelly-copter."

"What do you call an airplane that has sex with both men and women? A biplane."