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Joke of the Day
"Grrr why is it so hard to get a qsn stick in the right way! Dammit I mean a usb stick."
Next Joke
"Barista: name? Benedict Cumberbatch: Benedict Cumberbatch Barista [writes ""Benedict Cumberbatch""] Benedict Cumberbatch: holy shit"
"Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor."
"I like my racist jokes like I like black people! I don't like black people."
"Useless trying to undo a mistake. Focus your efforts on new ones."
"[in DM] She: Don't talk like that. Me: With my thumbs?"
"Why are jack-o-lanterns inbred? because they pump-kin"
"If you've never heard a 9 minute version of ""Girl From Ipanema"", then you weren't just inside my head while my co-worker was talking to me."
"""to my son, i leave my bathroom scale"" the lawyer sighs ""because where theres a will, theres a weigh. to my wife, i leave my last high five"""
"What do Terry Fox and Adolf Hitler have in common? Neither one of them could finish a race."