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Joke of the Day
"You call it being sober. I call it on my way to the liquor store."
Next Joke
"Sorry for loudly singing ""Whoomp there it is!"" when you took your pants off. It's been a while."
"Racist joke What's the difference between a cupcake and a Jewish person? A cupcake doesn't burn othe oven"
"What does it sound like when a Pterodactyl urinates? There is no sound... The P is silent."
"Back in my day, we didn't have Twitter, Facebook, or even the internet. Guys would have to walk uphill for days to tell me that I'm gay."
"Now that the Olympics are over, Michael Phelps can finally be released back to his natural habitat; the couch with a bong."
"A man asks the waiter: ""Why do you have your thumb on my steak?"" ""So I don't drop it again, Sir."""
"It's a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green."
"Why can't a blonde count to 70. Because 69 is a mouthful."
"What dog rides a horse named Macaroni? Yankee poodle!"