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Joke of the Day

"The jerk store called They say your order of Jamaican spices is in."

"Some say my wife looks like Mel B. Unfortunately, the B stands for Brooks."

"I have a special place in my heart. For blood and vessels and stuff."

"Why don't Purdue athletes eat pickles? They can't get their heads in the jar."

"What does snoop dogg use to wash his clothes? BLEYOTCH!"

"Do you like long lines, mass transit and sweaty white people? Ask your doctor if a Disney trip is right for you."

"Piracy dates back to the 14th century, when armed criminals boarded ships and viciously watched movies that weren't out yet"

"People keep saying I need to be more assertive Is that okay?"

"Why was 6 afraid of 9? Because 9 was still alive."

"""Don't fret."" -Guitar that apparently doesn't want to be played"