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Joke of the Day

"I don't know why, but there were a lot of really disappointed convict's in my first class of Gen. Chem..."

"What do Princess Di's coffin and a Queen Bee have in common? They're both filled with Royal Jelly."

"I googled 'Gary Oldman' and left off the 'r' It was the longest 3 hours of my life."

"I have a really annoying joke but first you will need to take a deep breath and blink hard... Ha, now you are conscious of your breathing and blinking."

"Did you hear about all the students who are using brake fluid to get high? The teachers aren't too worried about it. The students can stop anytime."

"ME: I'll have the burger. WAITER: And how do you like your burger? ME: I don't know. You haven't brought it to me yet."

"Everything's so politically correct nowadays that you can't even say ""black paint."" Instead you have to say ""Jamaal please paint my fence."""

"Two goldfish are in a tank... One said, ""you man the guns, and I'll drive""."

"Had a German plumber over today And he managed to plug our gas line to the shower. Guess old habits is hard to get out of Edit: spelling"

"A police officer sees a kid on the street.. He says, ""Its getting late kid, shouldn't you be getting back to the orphanage?"" Kid says, ""I guess so, what gave me away?"" ""Your parents did."""