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Joke of the Day

"I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my Grandfather. Not screaming and flailing about, like his passengers."

Next Joke
 
"I like my slaves the same way I like my coffee Free"
"Huehuehue SaturationSaturationSaturation"
"I'm going to leave the presents out and hide my kids in the closet until Christmas."
"I want to see a pregnancy test commercial where 2 single people high five the shit out of each other because it's negative."
"There are 10 kinds of people in this world Those who get binary, and those who don't."
"What are my views on lesbian relationships ? I view it in HD."
"Why was the mushroom a hit at parties? Because he was a *fungi*"
"What do you call an Englishman with an IQ of 50? Colonel, sir. ^ ^"
"Husband: [sends text] We need to break up. Wife: [sends text] WTF! Husband: [sends text] Sorry. That was meant to go to someone else."