204103
Joke of the Day
"What did one tomato say to the other? Catch up."
Next Joke
"Whats the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? BMWs have the pricks on the inside!"
"How does Harry Potter go down a hill? By walking. JK. Rowling."
"Give me a compliment. A woman looks into the mirror and says to her husband: ""I feel fat, old and ugly, give me a compliment"". The man replies: ""Your eyes are still working great""."
"[Infomercial] HOST: Wanna learn how to lose up to 15 pounds with one simple trick?!? AUDIENCE: Yes! HOST: Here's how! *rips off his own arm*"
"Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine? When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week."
"She was a fax machine She kept her modem clean She was the best damn printer that I've ever seen"
"Guess who I bumped into at Specsavers Everyone"
"What's the downside of house arrest?"
"[hospital] DOCTOR: you're ok ME: so it was just a dream DOCTOR: no your heart did turn into a bowl of cereal but your system is accepting it"