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Joke of the Day

"*pregnant wife wakes up* I think my water broke *I hide the Kool-Aid packet and water jug I spilled in bed* Let's go to the hospital"

"Name please ""Yo-Yo Ma"" Your full name [quietly] ""Yoghurt-Yoghurt Marmalade"""

"What is the difference between 2 dicks, and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke."

"What's the best part of having sex with twenty-six year olds? There's 20 of them!"

"How to insult a nerd ""Is rhat an Apple Watch?"""

"What's a polar bears favourite pasta? Penguini!"

"What's the difference between a midget and a venereal disease? One's a cunning runt and the other's a running cunt."

"What's the Difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? One's $2.50 and the Other's Under a Buck!"

"What do you call a bear without teeth? A gummi bear."

"What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Finding half a worm in it. And what's worse than that? The holocaust"