203519

Joke of the Day

"Why is today John Philip Sousa Day? Because he told everyone to march fourth."

"PEOPLE OF THE PLANE LISTEN TO ME WHEN THE SEATBELT LIGHT GOES OFF STAND UP IMMEDIATELY OR YOUR SPOT IN THE NON-MOVING LINE WON'T BE ASSURED"

"Is that a Nexus 6 or are you just happy to see me?"

"Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate his food before it was cool."

"What do you call five black people having sex? A threesome"

"Why can't you trust atoms? Because they make up everything"

"The last item on my bucket list is dying. How convenient."

"I'm not saying my ex is crazy,but The only way to take her picture, is with a Bi-Polaroid"

"I keep ringing Screwfix... .. To this day they still insist they're not a matchmaking agency!"

"Nick Cannon is the new face of Radio Shack both of which apparently still excist"