203221

Joke of the Day

"Who runs the 100 acre wood website? www.innie the pooh."

"... Q.) Why would a blonde wear green lipstick? A.) Because red means Stop."

"What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!"

"Hey girl, are you Karma? ...because Karma is a bitch."

"Where does the little king keep his little armies? Up his little sleevies."

"Wife [interrogating]: How long have we been married dear? Me: How dare you try and sneak maths into this."

"Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mine?"

"Ppl freakin cuz its sharks in the ocean. News flash: that's where they live! If u see them at Chipotle, then we have a problem"

"Baby detective: These stab wounds here, they- *coroner covers the body with a sheet* Baby: OH MY GOD. THE BODY! ITS GONE! WHERE DID IT GO"

"People who write ""loosing"" when they mean ""losing"" need to get loost."