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Joke of the Day
"Why did the mean and mode laugh together? Because they had a co-median between them."
Next Joke
"What did one pizza tell the other pizza? A cheesy pun."
"Remember that time when we got trapped on a ski-lift for 4 days, then the acid wore off and we were just sitting on my grandmas porch-swing."
"Customer: You said these pants were pure wool but the label says ""all cotton."" Salesman: Oh that's just to keep the moths away."
"How do you confuse a straight person? Tell them they're straight."
"*opens cartomn of eggs revealimg twelve rocks wher the eggs normaly go* guys shh ill get u past security this way, jus keep actimg like eggs"
"Kids claim to be such big fans of Mickey Mouse, but you don't see them with an icechest full of Capri Sun tailgating for Disney On Ice."
"Thank goodness for loyalty program emails. I keep forgetting what brands I'm loyal to."
"I was very naive sexually. My first girlfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months"
"""Dad, why isn't there chocolate meatloaf?"" - my brilliant 3 year old son Patrick"