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Joke of the Day

"I started a company... I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof."

"Pavlov That name rings a bell..."

"I'm really not a fast driver I just don't like having anyone in front of me... Officer"

"What happens when you combine bleach and a girl dog? You get a basic bitch"

"Kardashian How many Kardashians does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. They just hold it up because the world revolves around them."

"Your mama is so: need some material.."

"How do you spell coward? S-O-N-Y"

"Sorry in advance Why did Helen Keller dog kill itself? You would to if your name was aaaaaaaauuuuggggfdddshnvxxkjkuuokkgdsgj"

"Whenever I tell someone I'm Russian they tell me to slow down."

"If we all winked, laughed out loud, stuck out our tongues and blew kisses in real life as much as we do in texts...it would be very creepy."