203049

Joke of the Day

"What part of a heavy metal show involves bad jokes. Smosh pits."

"If I was a drunk superhero, I'm pretty sure I'd be ""I Love You Man"""

"My dentist reminded me of my wife's sensitive gag reflex. We laughed & laughed. Then I remembered that my wife & I have different dentists."

"STOP TELLING ME YOUR NEWBORN'S WEIGHT AND LENGTH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THAT INFORMATION."

"My doctor says I'm allergic to feces I am the egg man. Poopoo, achoo!"

"What do you call Nazis undergoing decomposition? Necrotizing Fascists."

"Why was hitler bad with directions? Because three reichs don't make a left."

"just got up in the middle of breakfast and left my mom in the restaurant because she complimented this guys trump hat"

"Lost my car keys so I'm forcing the guy at Home Depot to make me new ones based on what I remember about them."

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because, I'm still a little sore"