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Joke of the Day

"Why was E the only letter in the alphabet to get Christmas presents? Because the rest of the letters are not-E."

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The Bartender says, ""Hey, Rene, you want a scotch?"" Descartes replies, ""No, I think not."" And then he vanishes. No dice."

"What do you get if you cross King Kong with a giant frog? A monster that climbs up the Empire State Building and catches aeroplanes with its tongue."

"a fun game to play at the zoo is to walk hurriedly past a person and say ""they've escaped. don't run. just walk very fast."""

"It's crazy how quick women are to cut each other's throats over a guy! I mean I'd understand if it were shoes....but a guy???"

"What is Mister Miyagi's favorite drink? Jack Daniels-san"

"If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, what would he be famous for? Old age."

"Why wasn't Caitlyn Jenner charged with vehicular manslaughter? It wasn't her fault. Her tranny slipped."

"Motels may wanna take down that ""Color TV"" sign. We know."

"Even with all the flooding in LA I don't think the police should be able to shutdown the major roadways.. Because that's highway robbery"