202214

Joke of the Day

"How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it and set it on fire : WOOF! How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Freeze it and put it thru a table saw: meeeeooooow"

"how many chefs does it take to change a,light bulb ? one to do it, and five others to tell him how they did it differently in their last kitchen."

"Best pun ...EVER Unfortunately I didn't go to the Gym today but the cashiers name at McDonald's was Jim .... So same thing, right??"

"""You can't stand there."" ""Not there, either."" ""Nope that spot's taken, too."" -Ground hogs"

"TIFU by serving a hasidic man a footlong Italian BMT. Oops, wrong sub."

"Cute guy: Is this seat taken? Me: (ok, play it cool) No. *smiles* Him: *takes chair away*"

"*double-checks the constitution to see if we really have to have a president*"

"I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised."

"There is no more cake. This is my suicide note."

"What did the ant say when he walked into the insurance office? Insure ants?"