201756

Joke of the Day

"He's dead, Jim. Bought the farm. Bit the pita. Shanked the llama. He's a shit pinata. He's gone elf. Dropped the fudgsicle. No more potatoes"

Next Joke
 
"If you're not buying kraft mac and cheese you might be buying an impasta."
"The missus just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline. She hit the roof."
"New egg is so Corny (Have they always done this) http://oi61.tinypic.com/33kak2a.jpg"
"If you play Stairway to Heaven backwards does it become Highway to Hell?"
"What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care."
"What actor touches every girl on set? David Cop-a-feel"
"Just thought of one: Why is an abortionist good to have on your team? If you conceive something, they can execute it."
"I guess I just felt safer when Martha Stewart was still in prison."
"My wife told me she was going to leave me because of my obsession with The Monkees, at first I didn't believe her... ...But then I saw her face."