201581

Joke of the Day

"So a homeless man comes up to us... ""If I tell you a funny joke, would you pay me a quarter?"" My pal from Rhode Island say in a thick northeastern accent: ""I gotta funny joke fo' yah... Yah homeless."""

"I went to a military history exhibit at a museum in Little Italy. I saw a cool old German submarine. I walked up to a guy and said, ""Hey, is that a U-boat?"" He said, ""No, it's-a the museum's!"""

"Jesus rose on the third day. He then went over to the men and said... ""Hola, senor! What is my job?"""

"Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted to get a long little doggy"

"Just found some clothes my ex left here. Perfect timing since I'm out of toilet paper."

"What Did H Say 2 O? Water you doing?"

"Recording on an Australian tax help line If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2."

"Help with telegraph/Morse code joke I am doing a presentation on the Telegraph and my teacher is a sucker for a good joke/pun. Any help?"

"Me: Wow, you're glowing. Her: Aaaaww, thank you! Me: No, like radioactive... Her: . . . Me: Tone down the filters?"

"Do mermaids smoke seaweed?"