201571

Joke of the Day

"Every day I swallow a piece of gum in the hopes that one day I will fart a bubble large enough to fly me around the world"

"What's black and sits at the top of stairs? Stephen Hawking after a house fire."

"I said ""no"" to a lot of things this year without giving them a chance. In 2016 I plan on saying ""maybe"" more and then changing it to ""no""."

"Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill? It ran out of juice."

"Women Q: What do you call a woman without an @sshole? A: Divorced"

"What's white and covers the road in the early morning? Employed people."

"Kanye West can't wait to be the best man at his wedding."

"Interviewer: So, Floyd can you give us amateurs some tips in the ring? Floyd: It's all about speed and quick reaction time- This Joke has been removed by 'Fine Brothers Entertainment'"

"I just heard Bill is interested in Hillary again... She's barely legal..."

"""Why did he win?! Anyone who supports Trump is nuts!"" said the Hillary supporter, fully unaware that cashews alone outnumber humans 50 to 1 ..."