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Joke of the Day
"I told my dad I didn't want to walk all the way there... ...He said: ""That's a lame excuse""."
Next Joke
"What did you do for Mothers Day yesterday? Mothers Day is this upcoming Sunday."
"When people say ""To be honest..."", it means that up to that point they've been lying."
"The other day, a wizard offered to turn me into a cat. The suggestion gave me pause."
"I hate it when I punch ghosts! http://imgur.com/lVv8D6W"
"How did one tire get the attention of another tire? pssssssssssst"
"It's pretty silly to be afraid of spiders when most of them have probably never answered a text message with a phone call."
"Q: How many Canadians does it take to change a lightbulb ? Q: How many Canadians does it take to change a lightbulb ?"
"So i was fucking this midget with one arm (nsfw) Boy, is my arm tired."
"Your momma's so fat, she's like the negative cosine of X... They both go down after pi"