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Joke of the Day

"If she ever says: What did you just say!? I recommend an immediate heart attack and let the paramedics carry you out of the room."

"HEY PIGS STOP TRYING TO SWALLOW ENTIRE APPLES YOU KEEP DYING"

"I don't know if digital anal sex toys would be legal.... But iAnal"

"""It's okay, man. There are a lot of fish in the sea."" -Weird way to comfort someone whose nephew has just died."

"*standing outside your house I was totally going to stalk you but... *pets your dog instead"

"Joke A dyslexic man walked into a bra."

"Don't be afraid to be open-minded. Your brain isn't going to fall out."

"Apple Watches your money go into their pocket."

"Did you hear about the new sprinklers from Australia? They're Aussielating."

"When someone tells you that they cut their own hair, it's polite to act surprised"