201161

Joke of the Day

"If Shakespeare was a pun master Then he would make a play on words"

"How do you get a man to stop biting his nails? Make him wear shoes."

"Kevin fills a beaker of water and places it on the machine... ""One liter of water."" it read. Kevin gasped and sat back in his chair ""This speaks volumes..."""

"What did the rubber ball say when he left the yo-yo's late night house party? You better get some sleep - I'm gonna bounce!"

"First date Her: So what do you do? Him: I'm currently trying to eliminate all cancers Her: Wow, impressive Him: Then I'll move on to Virgos"

"A student was writing all his answers in ||||| format... Teacher: What are you doing? Student: I am writing all my answers in bar code, so that no one can copy it... New Method of Answer"

"Men want to be him. Women want to be with him. Bears want to eat him. Botflies want to lay their eggs in his skin. Fish are unaware of him."

"What's a nymphomaniac cook's least favourite ingredient? Italian dressing"

"Jokes That don't work written down There were 30 cows in a field, twenty ate sheep, how many didn't?"

"How many Horsemen of the Apocalypse does it take to change a lightbulb? Three. War never changes."