200917
Joke of the Day
"People who claim to talk to God are so delusional.. I've never talked to any of them."
Next Joke
"Relationship status: Putting aloe on the wall and rubbing against it to apply in places that I can't reach."
"When/If Scotland becomes independent, what will the national currency be called? Doesn't matter, you won't be able to pry it out of the cheap bastards' hands anyway."
"Sometimes I feel like a man trapped in a woman's marriage."
"Wife leaves keys on counter with a helpful note saying ""keys"" in case I thought they were llamas."
"Never trust a married guys opinion of who's hot. It's like asking a starving guy what food tastes good."
"No one is ever able to catch me. What country do I live? Iran"
"You might think a man's anatomy is quite similar to a woman's.... But there's a vas deferens."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? ""Its a really obscure number. You've probably never heard of it."""
"Give a man a fish and he will think, ""What a creepy gift."" Teach a man to fish and he will think, ""My god, I have never known such boredom"""