200604

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Mexican that lives in Maine An L.L.Beaner"

"Research shows that in 100% of cases, when someone says ""Oh no she didn't!"", she in fact, did."

"Zelda Williams came over my house and stormed out in a rage... All I did was ask her ""How's it hangin?"""

"I went to the library and asked if they had the book about tiny penises. The librarian said ""I don't think its in yet"". I said ""Yes that's the one""."

"Studies show that, on average, humans kept in cubicles live just as long as free-range humans."

"What do you call a jungle where animals talk about current events? A topical rainforest."

"Friend: check out my conscience shell Me: you mean conch? *holds up to ear* Shell: you saw those kids get in that van and you did nothing"

"Psychiatrist ""Tell me about your trust issues."" Me ""No"""

"The HARDEST part about being a teenager? Probably having to sigh a second time when the first was too quiet."

"DOC: We think you may have a phobia of marriage. Do you know what the symptoms are? ME: Can't say I do DOC: That's one of the symptoms, yes."