20037

Joke of the Day

"My teacher always hated my answers to her math questions. ""If I have 6 candy bars in one hand and 7 in the other, what do I have?"" Diabetes?"

"COP: The killer wrote a message on the victim's mirror ME: You can't prove it was me COP: It was written in Dorito dust ME: I want a lawyer"

"Your chances in Vegas are better than you think. 1 out of 5 times you'll get an std."

"When one door opens, another one opens, and then another, and another. Because kids."

"What do you call Mexican stoners? Baked beans"

"My credit card was stolen yesterday... Not sure if I should report it, the thief is spending a lot less than my wife normally does."

"I just want a time machine so I can show up at the Salem witch trials with an iPad."

"rubbish invention I made a sandal for people with only one leg. it was a flop."

"Why did the teacher wear sunglasses? Because his class was so bright!"

"So a man comes into a bar... No wait it was a horse! So a man comes into a horse..."