200216

Joke of the Day

"Send me your home address and I'll mail you a personal drawing of your favorite animal as long as its a buffalo."

"A midget fortune teller killed his clients and fled... He is a small medium at large."

"*Buys map of world, pins it up on wall* *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands* *Visits the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*"

"Grandpa...why is there a suppository in your ear? Oh... THAT's where my hearing aid went!"

"You know what grinds my gears? Improper gear ratios and speed differences."

"Why does the internet always mourn the death of politicians? Because they are always lion about everything."

"What has 99 legs and one tooth? The front row at a Willie Nelson concert."

"Q: What is Iraq's national bird ? A: Duck"

"What do you call a skank playing ""H.O.R.S.E?"" She missed two shots, so she's a ho. I'll leave now."

"What is the difference between a snowman and a snow woman ? Snowballs."