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Joke of the Day

"Schools are reporting a massive jump in average ACT scores. On a completely unrelated note, the amount of black students taking the ACT is at a all time low."

"Did you hear about the power surge across the street? I heard it was a shocking experience."

"New study shows you can get HIV/AIDS from toilet seats in public restrooms By sitting down before the other guy gets up"

"Power Rangers taught me that the way to solve a problem is to pose in front of it aggressively until it explodes"

"Whats the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest? A bomb vest does something when triggered."

"Did you hear about the surgeon that got sacked for having sex with his patients? It's a shame really. He was a damn good vet."

"If I were a fashion designer I wouldn't spend any money on advertising but rather pay old people to wear my competitor's clothing"

"When starting a new relationship it's important to remember that someone already screwed them up for you."

"""IT'S A BOY"" I shouted, tears rolling down my face ""I DON'T BELIEVE IT. A BOY!"" It was at that moment I chose never to visit Thailand again."

"Did you hear about the new toilet upstairs? That's some next level shit"