199505

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Rottweiler and a Poodle? If a Rottweiler starts humping your leg you let it finish."

"[quietly] ""Always a bridesmaid never the bride"" BRIDE: Hey, you're not one of my bridesmaids! ""Shhh...this day is about you, not me."""

"Did you hear what happened to Lot's wife? She got assaulted"

"""daddy why did the moon turn red?"" ""because god is flooding it with the blood of all the children who ask too many questions sweetie"""

"Why are powerpuff girls sad? [Nsfw] Because they neither have boyfriends nor fingers"

"What u call a Jewish Asian? Japplebaum."

"Curiosity killed the..... Martian race"

"Why can't rock climbing instructors get dates? Because they rappel men and women."

"CW: My wedding is going to be expensive! Me: Wait till you see what the divorce is going to cost you!"

"Two eggs boiling in a pan, one male and one female... The female egg says ""Oh my, look, I've got a crack"" ""No good telling me"" replies the male egg, ""I'm not even hard yet"""