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Joke of the Day

"[Dark] What is a Muslims favourite phone? Galaxy Note 7 (Exploding Variant) Just kidding it's an iPhone, you racist fuck. This joke has probably already been said before, so please up-vote."

"Someone once told me, ""GO FOR BROKE"" !! I'm happy to report that I succeeded..."

"25 pumpkins only 90's kids could spice"

"Guys; if she stops responding to your messages for days, 100% of the time it's a technical problem. Keep trying."

"""Sir how did you survive the snowmageddon?"" ""I stayed in"" ""Oh"""

"What do pirates of the 21st century wear? An iPadth."

"Oh look what the cat dragged in [cat drags in dead body] Cat: quick we need 20lbs of lye and two shovels"

"I just crashed a massive party... ...bus. Luckily there were no major injuries"

"Congratulations to our winner, Todd, who correctly guessed there were ""hella jellybeans"" in the jar."

"*a jerk tries to punch me but I catch it perfectly in my mouth and swallow him whole like a snake*"