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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when an Eevee (Pokemon) evolves into what you want with no interruptions? DirecTV (Say it aloud)"

"You know what they say about guys with big cocks.... They need a big coop and pen to keep them in."

"How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb? Well I'm not just going to tell you. You need to figure it out yourself."

"How to kill time. Hold your right ear with your lett hand and your nose with your right hand, then hold your left ear with your right hand and your nose with your left hand, and repeat and repeat."

"What's the squeakiest ride at the fair? The haunted mouse"

"What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Naaaaagggghhhhhhh."

"Whenever my car won't start I open the hood so I can have a good look at all the things I don't understand."

"A lawyer I know is a big fan of U2 He's pro Bono."

"My 11 now wants to borrow clothes from my closet. Either she has great taste in clothing at an early age...or I dress like a tween."

"To all of the dyslexic population of Reddit: **UNTIE**"