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Joke of the Day

"My boyfriend said he wanted a man cave if we ever got a house together. I jokingly asked if I could have a lady cave ""Yeah. It's called the kitchen"""

"So my new girlfriend plays soccer professionally I think she's a keeper"

"What is the difference between me and my couch? My couch pulls outs"

"If by cat person you mean I like to sleep all day and poo in sand then yes I am a cat person."

"What does Snoop Dogg eat? Beets by Dre."

"How many blondes does it take to fix a lightbulb? A lot, because they're fucking stupid."

"A TV show where customers get to hear what employees said 10 seconds after they left the store."

"The Hunger Games Don't they play those in Africa?"

"Why did Yellow divorce Green? Because Green blue Indigo."

"Don't email me a link to a 6 minute youtube video. I wouldn't watch a video that long if in contained clues to solve my own murder."