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Joke of the Day
"Practice safe lunch... Use a condiment."
Next Joke
"I came up with a new word yesterday: Plagiarism"
"Kid sounds like the turtle from Finding Nemo http://youtu.be/3yDeag-HzuE"
"Cinderella is my favorite fairy tale about how foot size is the best way to recognize someone."
"The Dalai Lama Walks Into a Pizza Shop... ...and asks says, ""Can you make me one with everything?"""
"Why was the bodybuilder arrested at the elementary school? Because it was a gun-free zone"
"Maybe don't show me a picture if you don't want me to rate your baby."
"You know what gets me down? Gravity..."
"An Irishman walks into an AA meeting. Just kidding."
"[1st date] date: ...you said you had abs me: [squints] everyone has abdominal muscles, Susan"