197421

Joke of the Day

"I just flew into town and boy are my arms tired! Get it? Because, I've been jerking off on the plane..."

"Kid, are you a nuclear reactor? Because you're having a meltdown."

"Oedipus the King You know, Oedipus the king really gives new meaning to the term ""mother fucker""."

"Axl Rose: Where do we go? Me: Left Axl: Where do we go now? Me: Straight. Axl: Oh, where do we go now? Me: Damn it, Axl, let me drive!"

"What television show best describes a mothers virginity? Lost"

"Steven Gerard has finished his book about his football career, the problem is that he hasn't got a Title..."

"214 of the 234 girls rescued in Nigeria from Boko Haram are pregnant? The other 20 girls must feel pretty fucking ugly."

"Son: How much does it cost to get married Dad? Father: I don't know son I'm still paying for it."

"When I have money, there's nothing to buy. When I don't have money, I want everything."

"What song did Kim Jong Il request be played at his funeral? Journey - Don't Stop Bereaving."