197139

Joke of the Day

"JUDGE: I may send u to jail. But if u act less condescending, I'll let u go free ME [waving goodbye to my family] u mean condescendingLY"

"What do you call a fat town Obe-CITY"

"Occasionally, a true friend gives his paw not his hand..."

"An optimist says the glass is half full, a pessimist says the glass is half empty... ... an engineer just points out that the glass is twice as big as it needs to be."

"You say jump I say how high. You say run I say how fast. You say lets hang out I say no."

"Biggest Jewish Dilemma? Free Bacon!!"

"""Son it's time we had the talk"" ""Cmon dad I know about se.."" ""Jet fuel can't melt steel beams"" ""What?"" ""It was an inside job"""

"It's called a ""Monte Cristo"" sandwich because one day it will return disguised as another sandwich & seek its revenge"

"Thanks to Twitter, rock bottom now has a waiting list."

"Why did the idiot drive his pickup truck over the side of the cliff? He wanted to try out his new air brakes."