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Joke of the Day

"Kim Jong Un Executed 15 Officials This Year, South Korea Says Not sure how he did it but that is just amazing, great job Kim Jong."

"Place a STUDENT DRIVER sign on top of your car, and suddenly nobody suspects you of drunk driving."

"Leaked CSI Reno script. Detective: Why did you do it Johnny, why did you shoot him? Psycho-killer: Just to watch him die..."

"A woman recently got breast implants made from oak wood. It would be funny if this joke had a punchline, Wooden tit?"

"A man walks into a flower shop and discovers something new: a bonsai palm tree in a pot. As he admires the plant he says, ""With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"""

"What did Steven hawking say when he first got his wheelchair? I can't stand being in this"

"When I was 13 I prayed to God to lengthen my penis by 1"". I think I made him angry. Either that or the Olympian Gods answered my prayer."

"I raised the alarm at work today. The midgets were all furious."

"My parrot died today... I think its last words were, ""Fuck, I think my parrot is dying."""

"So...Donald Trump was on The View today. I kept rewinding it and watching it trying to spot Elizabeth Hasselbeck's boner."