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Joke of the Day

"I've got a chicken proof lawn It's impeccable"

"How do I take my coffee? Uh..Orally. Why? How do you take it? Freak."

"Down a flight of stairs. That's how I roll. :("

"Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Because sheep can hear a zipper up to a mile away."

"My friend told me I don't know what irony is Which was ironic, because we were at a bus stop."

"[OC] Did you hear the one about the douchebag bodybuilder with the anal fissure? He's one ripped asshole."

"If Twitter was any more fun we'd have to smuggle it in from Mexico."

"Most guys will go gay for the night with the right amount of sangria & Foreigner playing in the background Don't ask me how I know"

"It was called a jumpoline...... Until your mom got on it."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Caesar ! Caesar who ? Caesar quickly before she gets away !"