195083

Joke of the Day

"How do you know a gypsy woman is pregnant? You put a piece of wire in her and if you feel pulling she is indeed pregnant."

"I think it's pretty cool Chinese people made a language made entirely out of tattoos."

"How you can see if a blonde is telling bullshit? Her lips are moving."

"My wife asked me for a double-entendre.... .....so I gave her one."

"""I'd like you to go down to the shop and ask for a matteryogi."" *""But, what's a matteryogi?""* Nothing Boo Boo"

"my mate rang me earlier.... My mate rang me earlier and says ""Hey dude, what you up to?"" ""Probably failing my driving test"" I say"

"First they came for the people who say ""Awesome sauce,"" and I said nothing, because, frankly, those people deserve it."

"What's the best day of the week to marry your gaming console? Wednesday"

"When I'm on phone with tech support or costumer service, I say the whitest shit. ""Sure thing"" - ""You bet"" - ""Correct"" - ""Tell me about it"""

"Your Facebook posts are like your children. Some go on to become successful and others make you look stupid."