194897

Joke of the Day

"I was trying to recall what size shirt to get my friend the psychic, then I remembered.....medium, of course."

"Our team is doing so badly that ""Manager of the Month"" isn't an award. It's an appointment!"

"It was called a jumpoline...... Until your mom got on it."

"If Trump replaces Obama in the white house, then we can all say... Orange is the new Black. Thanks, ~~I'll see myself out.~~ Apparently, I don't need to."

"If you want to work with livestock, you better know your farm animals, kid! A kid is a baby goat.. That's the joke..."

"What do republicans and porn stars have in common? They're both professionals at switching position on camera"

"*installs google translate* *looks at Arabic tweets for jokes to steal* *finds half my tweets doing better than mine*"

"What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect ? The Masked-quito !"

"who called it an infinity scarf instead of a scaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

"You're all arguing about what color the dress is... While I'm having sex with the girl who took it off."